What Are We Going To Do About John Stamos?

"Ode To Noah"

I was rifling through some old files the other day and I came across a poem I had written for English class back in the Fall of '94. I didn't have many friends back then.

Beep beep blips the heart rate machine.

Much like my own heart pines for thee.

Rejoice! The wonder that is must see Thursday.

Wyle is the Noah, Wiley is the coyote.

Stat! Stat!

Bring hither the Ccs!

Morphine for my soul that longs to meet the man, the hair, the Carter.

Rejoice! Thy emmy awaits, reach out and taketh.

-Jonesy

The Rubber Chicken Of Inspiration

Someone at work didn't think I would create this Powerpoint presentation and then present it to the entire company during one of our meetings.  They were wrong.

-Jonesy

Wow. My Netflix queue is quite awesome and terrible.

I really wish I could remember my state of mind when this chunk of inspiration was created. Must have been out of meds that day. WTF???

-Jonesy

Everyone keeps telling me that retro-fashion is “in”. So, last night I wore my head gear from 3rd grade out to the bar...

And I gotta tell ya... I really felt like one of those catwalk supermodels they way everyone was staring at me slack-jawed. All eyes on me. What can I say? It felt good.

But, ya know, I'm sure it's going to get really lame when EVERYONE starts wearing their head gears. Before you know it... retainers, spit-guards, and any other orthodontic appliance you can think of is going to be flying off the shelf of every hipster thrift store in the U.S. And then probably Latin America a few years from now when they catch up to our trends.

But at least I can say I was there. Where it all started.

-Jonesy